There comes a point in life when you are placed in the position of responsibility. When you are looked upon as the one in charge. The leader…whether well loved or despised.
Eyes point to you waiting for you to take command. And so you do, because for whatever reason, you were placed there. With the position comes payment but it’s currency is not something you can suspend, or cash out, or spend. Rather you save and deposit into your heart bank…something to be treasured because how does a mother, a woman, deplete the bank of love. We are incapable of not loving.
So you do what you must, you wake at all hours, swallow your worry, wipe away tears, hug away pain despite carrying your own. You cry in silence, and smile through heartache, and cover up the bruises, hide the internal bleeding, paint away dark circles and choke back weariness. You hold a great weight upon your shoulders and inside your heart because no one else is the stand-in when you haven fallen. You hobble with broken arms and legs, slip on messes and run on borrowed breath, work in the dark and burn under the sun because it requires that of you when you’re placed in the position of greater responsibility.
You are the leader and for some women, they reap the greatest of benefits. making it seem effortless, full of favors, receiving trinkets of quality, well cared for, well loved, wanted for their outer beauty. Yet, for others, with it the position comes a great price, a test of strength and stamina. Usually ran haggard, barely breathing, struggling in the climb, falling down, worn, neglected, and unloved and you are often left alone in that state… Ignored.
As a leader, whether weak or strong, whether you are the cause or effect, or both, regardless of how well you maintain the status quo…when it all falls apart, when it gets down to the dirt and grime of it. When everyone is standing around staring at you with hurt and venom in their eyes, and broken, and breathing hard after the fallout…You are the one they blame!
And you stand taking bullet after bullet, remain standing as the arrows fly, and spears stab, even when you are handed the cup of poison, you straighten your crown and swallow what has been given. There is no one else to take your place. You take hits because you are the leader!