6:oo am confessions… 

and its realized
the thing she
didn’t want to be
desperately so…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

without
open palms
stripped bare
of kindness 
words kill me
blood coagulated 
the hole in my chest 
action louder 
than words
silence even
more
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and she implored to
the mirror 
No matter how it hurts
she vowed to not
feel ashamed & humiliated 
for her capacity to love
the mirror hasnt accepted
her plea
apparently the mirror
knows a liar stands before her
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

…and still 
as my head falls forward
My heart sinks under 
waves of shame & humiliation 
for spilling my heart
I think its an illness in me
Im beginning to question
why i suffer from a heart exposed…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

where’s my inner iceberg queen
my cold cunt stare
my fuck off attitude
the I am awesome and 
it is  your loss mentality
where is she 
was I born without one
that push button bitch mode
instead I wield a knife
rip open my chest
and watch every single
male version hand 
take the knife…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I beg to bleed
too much
hate 
That I bleed 
hate
that I beg
hate that it happens
over and again
and still i do it
beg
-~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I can’t breathe…
I think his
air is leaving 

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