my oldest daughter…

My beautiful 18 is in for a little bit of a bumpy ride. She is 20 weeks pregnant today. My first baby girl is a woman having her first baby (dare I say girl…we will know on Tuesday). This was not a plan she had for her life.  She had dreams of making herself proud, finishing school being strong and independent, like she has always been since 2 potty training herself because she hated diapers! 

As I sit here in my bed she lies next to me (not feeling well, worn out, growing a human is hard) that beautiful face I have stared into for 18 years, young and tender, beautiful & vulnerable and dreaming as she sleeps. 

This may have not been her plan for life but…

Senior year in high school is hard enough and exiciting as one chapter is closing another mile stone earned and passed. She is handling it fiercely with occasional tears of frustration and uncertainty but I know she is strong enough to take it on and to push beyond the expectations others fear for her 

She is capable! She is facing this adversity and complication and will make it through this too; earning her beautiful tiger stripes with breathless beauty. 

It may not be what she envisioned for her life but she has been given a gift, and the most beautiful thing about it is that she recognizes it is a gift and a blessing,  and an honor

I knew she could do this, despite tears in her eyes when she looked at me and said, 

“Mom, I don’t have any other choice than to handle it…I am a mom now!”

God I love her unmeasurably more than my entire being can fathom…she will soon understand exactly what I mean

M

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8 thoughts on “my oldest daughter…

  1. I believe that she learned from you, and well. Grace, tenacity, inner strength that shows beauty through and through. The bond of motherhood is beyond words and she seems to recognise that already. It is a gift. I wish you both all the best in the world. xo

    Liked by 1 person

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