the sound of missing him…

she laid there with the barest of air

her beating heart faint

a fallen leaf left to the contention of concrete

the wind whispering in the distance

to capture her…to root her in air

and his roaring pulsed in her ears

a caucophony of longing…

the sound of love missing

 

 

 

 

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her dark vines…

I feel that rising of deep dark
I know what it means
I know survival
it doesn’t feel as choking if I surrender
so I will let it cover my feet
bind my hands
wrap around my chest…my spine
feel it settle across my mouth
shhhh…don’t try speak it away
just open to the flow of magma
let it burn
I am to lay here letting it ooze from my skin
I don’t even know what’s left inside me
perhaps its something God knows
here in this garden he grew inside me
weeds tangle softer blooms
killing their scent…
I know this too shall pass
and refinement I perpetually crave
 

rough…

 

lines feathered and muted

rough art inside me anymore

uncertainty blankets my heart

I don’t really fucking care anymore (I try to convince myself)

running sounds sane

yet I won’t escape

I’ve tried to exhale

waiting to be delivered from

every thought and feeling…

yes

no

I feel

I don’t

I don’t fucking care (silence is convincing me)

leave

love

lie

wtf ever

 

 

 

 

 

atom & cell…

more than anything 
as she becomes further matter
as she is more dissected 
thinned
finer
defined particles 
these atom & cell
more the less chance 
of breathing 
combing into he
She is feeling loss
an end before beginning 
to become he & she 
A Whole…

sweet death of a rose…


May death be sweet
like that of a dying rose
past her prime
when molecular structure is chaos
and her heart only knows
to fold and shut in

each petal breaks apart from stem
her last vein severed
though her fragrance lingers
her perfume long lay breathing

shall you watch her 
release her frame
this life inside her aching 
to sustain her worth
and to what moment 
does she finally herald
love, let go…
(don’t…not yet)

May her death be sweet
inhale her one last time
achingly embrace her
beautiful loss in goodbye 
yet do not not leave her 
unattended in her decay 
wondering the reason
of her bloom