gold riot…

I am gold dust anymore

dancing within the wind

wild and uncaring

catch my eyes shining

where only your storm remains

my lips no longer speak

of temptutous devils

their beautiful words

long murdered inside me

i know now

i know dark and light

smoked holes and divine temples

in far away places

my fingers tracing a riot and eternity

and you founded in every space

every line and curve

no other will do

I know now

I know

I know

believe

here I am

and you

 still existing

*For you darling

 

 

 

 

a beautiful soul…

There is this soul
who is beautiful air
a gentle teacher
a willing student 
whom has shown 
love and kindness 
my soul is filling 
because of his pathway
his belief
his beauty 
his pain
his name…
air

I am grateful

🙏🏻Namaste 

in glance of a photograph…

it is in a glance of you
my heart entranced
an unknown ocean swells
inside my chest 
underneath my ribs
rushing surf in my ears
epicenter of my heart
I wonder could I 
love like love should
more than now
any deeper
and why this way
and in this now
and you
yet still why would I 
imagine in limitation
think I do not fit your design 
or perhaps feel I am somehow 
faulted in meaning
am I not essential
why should I relegate 
I am not less than or 
culminate feels of a lesser thing
this soul is beyond comprehension 
unfathomable in ability
carries unknown space
Ageless in timelessness 
and yet, here
in this moment
I am her 
and she, me
in existence 
breathing you 
this love
of an ancient
and of a yet born…

and all in a glance
of a photograph 

sweet death of a rose…


May death be sweet
like that of a dying rose
past her prime
when molecular structure is chaos
and her heart only knows
to fold and shut in

each petal breaks apart from stem
her last vein severed
though her fragrance lingers
her perfume long lay breathing

shall you watch her 
release her frame
this life inside her aching 
to sustain her worth
and to what moment 
does she finally herald
love, let go…
(don’t…not yet)

May her death be sweet
inhale her one last time
achingly embrace her
beautiful loss in goodbye 
yet do not not leave her 
unattended in her decay 
wondering the reason
of her bloom
 

felled from my lips…

there will be an end…
I’m uncertain with which means it is to happen

perhaps I’ll be 105
well beyond breathing expectation

I may still carry an ocean in my eyes but maybe they’ll reflect his sky

I won’t ever unknow him and my heart races surging with that truth

yet I may never ever truly know the movement of he…my heart already feels every ounce of that kind of empty

I probably won’t hear very well at that age as my ears are forever plugged into music…even now I write with live and intoxicating sounds flowing through me

I am fluid in uncertainty; the remains of hesitation line my lungs; these effects travel through time…I know I still feel this, what this is in the now; and so feel it then

squeezing every drop of he from me…I’m airless and deaf in the loud disclosure of quietness; even then when I’m 105 I will feel as now; alone…uncared for…exposed and unfurled, scented with don’t waste me

I dont know how to navigate this terrain, its foreign soil slipping through my fingers, and chokehold on my red dusted heart

tell me, should I turn to leave
jump from cliffs
slide into the crevasse
disappear into a dark lake bottom
never speak of you again

I can’t undo you
too late 
I am 105, carried in my last breaths I whisper of now, of you, your every obscured words puzzled, nuzzled in my pores 

I whisper of the ghosts in your writing…chanting your name

come here
show me, love 
let me practice the entirety of you
open to me
the sound of you…

falling until felled from my lips

of implications darling…

I have not found an hour
in which thoughts 
have not drift 
to the sun of you
burning my mind
heart aglow and fiery
lighted over the seconds collected
raining us in heaven’s gold
forgiveness and salvation in length 
lovers stretch far across the night
reflected in midnighted moons
when did I realize that expanse of you
and this skin I’ve been wearing 
undesired
hiding the complexion of underneath 
salacious deep 
come shed me
to shed me of faded oceans
shed the old to reborn stars
understand this implication
of love existing
yet not in dreams 
rather persistent & real
let the measured 
dimensions of you
harbored in the place
before me
stay as is
beautiful framework 
of past lives left lived…
enter as otherworldly 
a bold unknown
do not deny I beg 
nor falter love

in this ever of hours…

will you kiss me
come midnight
love all my years
let all my trivialities
melt away from the
heat of your mouth

will you want my sex
come 1:00 a.m.  
taste rained earth
thirst & take more 
our blend forming
a perfect universe

will you read me passionately
come 3:00 a.m.
as it demands we meet often
under the stars and moolight
we never more than a few pages
away inside of our minds

will you wrap to my form
come 4:00 a.m.
contented with our rhythm and sound; the ease of breathing together 
to end & begin infinitely

will you wake me 
at 5:00 a.m.
to repeat our beckoning ache
once is never enough; 
nor is forever 

will you dream of me
come 6:00 a.m.
travel back a thousand years
to once again encounter me;
remember

or will you come
the ever of hours
release the tourniquet 
stay your distance
watch me bleed afar
until I am no more
your vision
no more your desire
if ever I was; am